October 13, 2011

  • “Love Her”

     

     

     

     

     

     

    One time, a motivational speaker was speaking at a conference. Afterwards, someone came up and said,

    “I like what you are saying, but my situation is so different. Look at my marriage. I’m really worried. My wife and I just don’t have the same feelings for each other we used to have. I guess I just don’t love her anymore and she doesn’t love me. What can I do?”

    “The feeling isn’t there anymore?” He asked.

    “That’s right,” the questioner reaffirmed. “And we have three children we’re realy concered about. What do you suggest?”

    “Love her,” the speaker replied.

    “I told you, the feeling just isn’t there anymore.”

    “Love her.”

    “You don’t understand. The feeling of love just isn’t there.”

    “Then love her. If the feeling isn’t there, that’s a good reason to love her.”

    “But how do you love when you don’t love?”

    “My friend, love is a verb. Love–the feeling–is a fruit of love, the verb. So love her. Serve her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that?

    “In the great literature of all progressive societies, love is a verb. Reactive people make it a feeling. They’re driven by feelings. Hollywood has generally scripted us to believe that we are not responsible, that we are a product of our feelings. But the Hollywood script does not describe the reality. If our feelings control our actions, it is because we have abdicated our responsibility and empowered them to do so.”


Comments (3)

  • so true. hollywood does not depict reality.

  • @wyrdkismet - I think the point is that love is not something you feel, it’s something you do

  • I swear that I am being told something today because in church the pastor was talking about how love is a choice…and then I read this. That being said, and me finally starting to understand what my pastor was talking about…it’s very hard to love someone when the action isn’t reciprocated in a way that makes the other feel the love…if that makes sense.

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